Toy

I know I said no before,

it is still a no now.

I look at you, I don't adore

but confused about what why how.

You said you are good for me,

that I do not deny.

But I just cant seem to say yes, you see,

unless I'm sure you're the right guy.

This is against the feelings inside

but I'm conscious I'm flirting back.

I know the same feelings, you're trying to hide.

Self-control, evident, is what I lack.

I still don't feel the way you do,

maybe love for a little brother.

You're pretending you feel this too

when its obvious I'm no sister.

But let's continue this pretence.

It's much more amusing than I thought.

Yea, it's against all common sense

but it makes us both happy, does it not?

Okay, may be it's only me

cause it's flattering and a hell lot of fun.

And if you think its too high a fee,

I suggest you'd better run.

Stupid Pig. Fat cow. Mute girl.

Move away from me.

Don't ask, just do,

for all the bruises, self-inflicted,

were instigated by you.

Do not get down on your knees

and beg forgiveness once again

and please do not insult me to the floor

screaming and wailing in pain.

No one has to go through agony.

You can leave with your head high.

But, do not patronise me, praise or pretend

that you were truthful for all your lies.

Your word gripping tightly onto my key

as i spotted, in your eye, a tear.

The locksmith approaches, tools and all.

My eye; your eye, a mirror.

i thought it was not possible

but i'm already dead inside.

Stupid Pig. Fat cow. Mute girl.

"Fuck off my life"

Awry

I really miss your love

but you said that i was mean;

the bully, the tyrant of your life,

the worst you've ever seen.

I kicked you in the face

and rubbed sea salt on your wounds.

Not only extinguished the fire of your sun

but also destroyed your moon.

I sneered at my own happiness,

making your stomach churn

so you went off again and

I burned.

I looked at the space where you were gone

and wondered how things could've been so wrong.