Burnt

You and I, both volatile.
What were we thinking?
Something. There must have been something
that drew us together like a moth towards the light.
You were mesmerizing,
as long as I didn't look into your eyes,
and I'm sure I was too.

It was ecstasy with you,
as long as I didn't care for anything you.
Like giant fires of passion,
we gravitated towards each other.
You and I, by leaps and bounds.
It was like we were one body.

But that's just it.
We were one body and just the body.
Nothing more but we needed nothing more.

We were so close. So close we clashed so
ever uncomfortably.
Burning each other. Scalding our souls.
That was for questioning more.

Scarred, we dare not venture to further premises again.
All burnt out now, the smoke so suffocating and dark.
There is no more light to guide our way.
I can hardly look at myself.

Alone

The loneliness is driving me crazy.
Life has no color.
Hell, it's not even a silent movie.
Everything has just been reduced to nothing.

I stand in the middle and there is just nothing around me,
mirroring all the crazy thoughts and feelings inside.

I am not numb.
I feel empty.

My heart sinks and sinks and sinks.
I wonder what it would be like in the palm of my hand?
Could I speak to it? Is it still alive?
Could it listen?
I have been listening hard to it but it makes no sound.
The general of the army, that is the whole of me,
has gone down.

Every soldier lost. Gossips everywhere but
I hear nothing.
I stand in the middle and there is just too much going on,
mirroring all the crazy thoughts and feelings inside.

I am not empty.
I feel alone.

Closed Doors

Fly with me, my darling.
I want you to feel the freedom that is
so precious nowadays.
Feel the wind on your face; the wind
you create from your speed.
You are in control now. I am going to let go.
Fly, my darling.

Enjoy it - the immense pleasure.
It is all so dreamy and woozy and just magnificent.
You are magnificent.
I am magnificent. This feeling... it is... remarkable
to say the least.
Breathe in the air, my darling.
Let it fill your lungs. Your red bloody lungs that thump with your bloody red heart.
Feel the adrenaline. Stupendous.
Feel the rush. Feel every blood vessel dilate.
Let's get higher.

Push, my darling.
Push it through. Soar.
Clench your muscles, they are intensified.
No one can see you in this night sky.
You are in space with the stars.
Gaze. They are like fireworks all around you.
Yes, the feeling. This feeling bursts from within.
You feel it on-, in-, under your skin. Whatever.
You don't give a fuck.
Just let yourself go.

Gasp. You gasp and the sun smiles at you warmly.
Time to go home, my darling,
open your eyes.

The mask dictates

"May I go out?" Stay in, bastard child.
Hide in the shadows. The light is not for you.
You will meet no one. No one.
No one will ever know you exist.
No one will ever hear your voice.
You are nothing.
Go back to your corner and cover your face.
You sicken me.
Move along now.

"Do you love me?" Of course I do.
You embarrass me. Move your ass else I'll kick you.
And shut your face.
Do not talk to me. Turn away.
Your eyes, so innocent, has seen more evil than
any putrid smiles. Trust no one.
Only I can protect you.
Now put on this veil.

"Why do I hide?" To save our face.
Think of what happens when people lay eyes on a bastard
like you? So useless. So unwanted. So incapable
of anything in this world.
This wonderful world is filled with laughter.
Are you happy? I thought so.
Bastards do not have a hint of bliss in them.
You do not belong.
Keep still now or I'll slap your cheek and chain you up.

"Do you want me?" Get down.
You need a whipping to learn your place.
Yes, you will learn like how you have been.
Every lash will let you grow.
It is your food. It is your water.
You crave it, don't you child? "Yes Mam."
Get down. Cover up those scars.
I don't want to see them.
They are disgusting.
You disgust me, love.

Back to the corner. Crawl, if you can.

Good girl. I'll put on your favorite song.
Melancholy, isn't it?
Hum it for me at the back of my head.
That's nice. You are a sweet little thing.

Facing stress. Beating stress. Releasing stress.

You can feel it, everyone can.

Everyone is roaring with excitement.

The atmosphere is hot, fire hot, searing hot.

You feel your heart pounding like a prisoner waiting to be released.

You raise your hands.

“And in this corner, weighing over 180 pounds,

the one you have all been waiting for… YOU!”

The crowd goes crazy and they scream like a singular voice.

They spin around you and you clench your teeth.

You come back to the ring and you hear silence.

You’re zoned in.

You face a formidable opponent – one that has hardly been defeated.

He smirks at you.

You stare back. Staring always does the trick.

Fear or be feared. You don’t want to lose.

[I have to win.]

Choose your weapons.

You go for your gloves. Of course you go for your gloves.

Titanium covering plated gold. Your favourite.

It signifies your prowess.

Cheers of approval made you feel amazing.

You bite your lip as you put in your mouth guard.

[You can do this]

The other guy picked a shield.

“Idiot.”

Game on.

You know you’ve lost.